Divorce hell! Any legal advice or other?

I split with my wife in April. She has had several affairs and we tried to made it work but couldn't.We have three children. I have part time custody and work full time. I have given her $2200.00 since April when she left. She doesn't have a job and doesn't have a lot of work experience. She's going back to school and will receive financial aid any day. She has paid the retainer on an attorney and threatens to take me to court, ';make things ugly';, and take the kids away from me, or only let me see them every other weekend. What are my rights here. We agreed that I would pay 650.00 per month for my three children and that I would get them on a very regular basis. She keeps changing the rules and asking for more, more, more. I don't mind helping out. I want my children to have everything they need. I just want to know my rights. I don't have enough to hire an attorney. She wiped out my bank account to hire hers just before she left. Please helpDivorce hell! Any legal advice or other?
why did u give her money for an attorney and not use that money for your own attorney? i have to ask why because when someone does u dirty why help them? i am afraid u will need an attorney to fight her for shared parenting. looks like she is going to cause u some trouble no matter how good and fair u have been to her. next time use your money for your own benefit, because by now u should be able to see u really can't trust this woman.and if u both agreed u probably would not have needed an attorney at all.Divorce hell! Any legal advice or other?
HIre a better lawyer, that is all you can do. You have every right to slander her name in court if she has been cheating on you and you have proof, and site the things that she does like wiping your bank account, and get a list of what she is spending this money on. Since, you have custody of the kids.
all you can do is take her to court. most lawyers have payment plans.
If she left then she's the one who looks bad. Stop giving her money and buy things for your kids yourself. You should look into getting sole custody of your kids also. She can't keep you from your kids, even if you don't pay support. Keep a journal of all her actions or words just in case. If you have part time custody you shouldn't have to give her any money. Try to keep this out of court just because of the money it will cost but by all means do all you have to for your kids. Hope this helps and good luck.
if you have 50/50 custody of your kids you wont owe her any money for child support!


i just went through a very ugly divorce.


what she may not realize if she takes you to court it will straight up cost $10,000 this is the paper work involved and the lawyer fees and judge fees.


one disadvantage for you is she has no job! and if she has no experience that will hurt you! she cant take away your kids unless she can prove beyond any doubt you are the most horrible father and being with you is detrimental to the childrens health.


good luck divorce is ugly and sticky


ps you wont have to pay her attorney fees!
You should go to court they usualy have a lawyer of the day which is free you may have to be there all day since most people take advantage of the free lawyer service and then get a court order for child suport and then you'll know what your paying every month and she can't change it since the court figures out what you make and what the kids need and it's based on that and then you dont have to worry about her asking for more cash good luck it's never easy getting a divorce
Basically, you're screwed. If you want to help determine YOUR future, you're going to HAVE to hire an attorney to represent your interests in court. SHE doesn't get to make all the ';rules'; on how this custody thing is gonna work out. A judge will see that there is a fair settlement %26amp; joint custody.


Maybe you should offer to 'take the kids off her hands' so she'll be free to go back to school! Then YOU can set the rules %26amp; see how she likes it!


And just so you'll know....most all attorney's offer a free consultation. Talk to one. Know your rights. Find an attorney that will allow you to set up a payment plan with their firm.
the court will always prefer and in fact try to force you to a settlement -


In New Jersey where I am - less than 2% of the divorce cases are settled by the court -


so - here's the deal -


if you can work it out - get a signed notarized agreement from her - that will hold up in court -


if you can't - then its lawyer time - and they will suck your blood - of course you will have to pay her attorney fees as well





as far as child support each state has guidelines based on your income - you can google your state's child support laws and they will have a table the outlines that -





allimony - she never worked - you gonna pay until she is self supportive and/or re-marries -





no money for a lawyer - if you got a VISA card use it - cuz if she gets one and you don't you are really screwed





bottom line - she is entitled to 50% of whatever you got - now you say she wiped out your bank account and hers - well half of that was yours - so document it and make that part of the settlement





good luck
Unfortunately, she's a lot smarter than you, even though she's a moron and a cheater.





I'm sure you mean well, but you can't have verbal agreements with someone like her and hope everything turns out ok! That's totally naive and your kids deserve a lot better, including time with you.





You have no choice - you're way overdue on an attorney. He might even be able to recover some of the money she took and if you have proof of her cheating, a lot of your problems could disappear. But you may not have the proof you need because you didn't get the attorney when you needed it!





This will impact the rest of your and your kids' life, so do what it takes to find one. You can't afford NOT to. Don't give her another penny - give it to your new attorney.
I was in a similar situation (but luckily no kids). I called around and found an attorney who I clicked with and did a consultation with her.





In this case she/he can look at your situation and give you general advice and tell you what your rights are. She also provided some documentation for me to read. I didn't have to pay a retainer, just a flat fee for the consult. That 1.5 hours gave me a lot more knowledge and understanding than I had, and it removed enough fear to give me confidence to deal with my ex.


Worst case, if things don't improve then you can retain him/her.